With Trump-Harris debate over and Election Day looming, here’s how to talk about politics with your kids

Parents may want to avoid talking about politics with their kids (and each other!). But in an election year, that’s easier said than done. Social media bursts the information bubble that once protected children and debates over curricula and reading lists put politics front and center in the classroom, leading parents to ask what their children are learning in school. These days, children at ever-younger ages are joining political conversations, and many are wondering, and worrying, about where the country is heading.

Parents can try to avoid talking about politics through November 5, or they can use the election to bring up more engaged, thoughtful citizens. And if the current discourse on social media and TV leaves something to be desired, it may be time to look to the past. 

What does it mean to be an American? Thomas Jefferson called the Declaration of Independence an ‘expression of the American mind,’ but in 1776, there was little consensus. Around one-fifth of Americans were Loyalists, and many left for Canada. Many were skeptical of ‘unalienable rights.’ They asked where do rights come from? What does it mean to believe that all human beings are created equal? Today, debates continue about America as an idea and as a nation, and about what the Founding meant.

How do we achieve equality? Abraham Lincoln delivered the Gettysburg Address in 1863, acknowledging that slavery contradicted our Founding ideals. Lincoln argued that the Civil War was a test of whether ‘any nation so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure.’ While the outcome of the Civil War was uncertain, millions of Americans—Black and White—risked their lives to ensure that those ideals would survive in the United States. Lincoln’s 272 words at Gettysburg offer a lens through which to debate the meaning of equality today and the tests we still face.

Tomorrow night, perhaps, it’s time to return to history. Talk with your children about what it means to be an American. 

Lesser-known presidents also shaped America’s great debates. James Garfield, mortally wounded just four months into his presidency, recognized the significance of the Reconstruction Amendments. He said that the elevation of Black Americans ‘from slavery to the full rights of citizenship’ was the most important political change since the Constitution’s adoption. Grover Cleveland, who rose to the presidency in just three years, captured the importance of principle over politics when he asked, ‘What is the use of being elected or re-elected unless you stand for something?’

What’s the purpose of American foreign policy? That question looms large, as the post-Cold War order faces assaults in Ukraine and the Middle East, and as tensions rise in the Indo-Pacific. In his Farewell Address, George Washington counseled us to, ‘Observe good faith and justice towards all Nations; cultivate peace and harmony with all,’ at a time when the United States was not yet the world’s leading power. Woodrow Wilson, nearly 150 years later, declared that America’s role then was to make the world ‘safe for democracy.’ The Truman Doctrine laid the foundation for U.S. policy throughout the Cold War. After 9/11, George W. Bush channeled the Jacksonian school of thought when he pledged at Ground Zero that ‘the people who knocked down these buildings will hear all of us soon.’ America’s role in the world has been shaped by historical context and tradition – and the presidents have debated it all.

A key question about the future is the possibility of scientific progress and the role of government in innovation. John F. Kennedy faced doubts that American technological leadership was still possible after Sputnik during the space race. But in 1962, he declared that America would go to the moon, not because it was easy, but ‘because it is hard.’ Seven years later, that vision was realized. Today, with astounding innovations like artificial intelligence and synthetic biology, we may be on the edge of another age of invention, and as in the Cold War, we face a great-power technology competitor, but this time in China.

Divisive or uninspiring political rhetoric is nothing new. But leaders’ words matter. Parents often tell their children to ‘use their words’ to get their point across, and though they may rightly want to shield their children from toxic discourse, especially as children grow up, they’ll learn about our politics. That’s part of being a citizen. And during the heated debates about the Constitution, John Adams wrote, ‘Children should be educated and instructed in the principles of freedom.’ 

Ignoring that task or ceding the education of the next generation to the internet or bad actors isn’t how a self-governing republic sustains itself. So where to start? 

In his farewell address, President Ronald Reagan reminded us, ‘All great change in America begins at the dinner table.’ 

Tomorrow night, perhaps, it’s time to return to history. Talk about what it means to be an American. After all, Reagan concluded, ‘That would be a very American thing to do.’